Most people hold the idea that one’s personality is determined once he was born, emphasizing stability over fluctuation. However, in my opinion, personality is “plastic” across situation, mood and time. Besides, I also believe that human personalities are built within a long time and strongly influenced by personal experiences.
Take children whose parents are divorced for an example. Most of them grew up in families lacking of harmony and happiness. As a result, these children have a much larger possibility to have distorted personality and a higher chance to commit a crime. Thus, the environment where a person grew up is a considerable factor contributing to his personality development.
Furthermore, I believe that people are able to be the ones they want to be; and in most cases they do. In that sense, personalities can be determined by ourselves. That is why we found that many people’s personalities were even changed to meet some requirements with the development of society. Take myself for an instance, my mother told me that when I was in the kindergarten I was so quiet and shy that I hardly speak to others, however, I tend to be talkative as I grew up. Maybe that is one of the changes in my personality that I have ever made consciously to adapt myself to social life and gain benefits.
In conclusion, I assert that personality can be changed; besides, it should be changed once we find it can benefit us.
Sunday, 22 April 2012
Saturday, 21 April 2012
blog 7: PEN
The pen shop located at the second intersection on the left side of the street. It was the central area of this old long street. Without any signboards, the shop had two glazed doors as shop front. The line pen shop was hiding in a corner beside the door written in small size. It seemed that the doors had been rarely used. It took me one year’s time to open it.
Nevertheless, it was not accessible unless you had an introduction letter. As a customer, you had to spend much time and much money. It deserved your cost if you could get a pen which was perfectly suitable for you. I was there, as a result.
The shopkeeper was probably as his sixties. He felt like a big bird resting deep in the forest.
“Give me your hand.” The big bird said.
He measured the length and width of each finger. After confirming the proportion of fat in my skin, he began to examine rigidity if my fingernail. After all, he took down the information of all the scars on my hand.
“Please take off your clothes.” He said briefly.
Although I was confused about the situation, I slowly took off my shirt. When I was about to take off my pants, the shopkeeper stopped me, “No need. It’s enough.”
He used his finger to press every part of my vertebra from top to bottom. “You know? Actually, people use their vertebra to think and write,” He said, “that is why I must make a perfect pen for every customer.”
Then, he inquired me about my age, job and my income. Finally, he asked me what I wanted to write with this pen.
After three months, my pen was made. It was a perfect pen. However, it did not mean that the passages I wrote with this perfect pen must be perfect.
If I wanted to buy my perfect passages, I should have taken off not only my shirt.
Nevertheless, it was not accessible unless you had an introduction letter. As a customer, you had to spend much time and much money. It deserved your cost if you could get a pen which was perfectly suitable for you. I was there, as a result.
The shopkeeper was probably as his sixties. He felt like a big bird resting deep in the forest.
“Give me your hand.” The big bird said.
He measured the length and width of each finger. After confirming the proportion of fat in my skin, he began to examine rigidity if my fingernail. After all, he took down the information of all the scars on my hand.
“Please take off your clothes.” He said briefly.
Although I was confused about the situation, I slowly took off my shirt. When I was about to take off my pants, the shopkeeper stopped me, “No need. It’s enough.”
He used his finger to press every part of my vertebra from top to bottom. “You know? Actually, people use their vertebra to think and write,” He said, “that is why I must make a perfect pen for every customer.”
Then, he inquired me about my age, job and my income. Finally, he asked me what I wanted to write with this pen.
After three months, my pen was made. It was a perfect pen. However, it did not mean that the passages I wrote with this perfect pen must be perfect.
If I wanted to buy my perfect passages, I should have taken off not only my shirt.
Friday, 20 April 2012
Blog 7: When Work As a Group
Blog 7 how to work efficiently in a team
In our daily life,we are often asked to work in a team,and sometimes we cannot finish a program ourselves. So,to some extent,the efficiency of the teamwork plays a decisive role in our career. For that reason, it is necessary for us to learn to work efficiently in a team.
When you and your teammates share with similar characters,you are very lucky. You can work efficiently with each other relatively easily. However,because that we are randomly divided into several groups, it is possible that the characters of members are totally different from each other in a team. When this happens, it will be a frustrating thing for each member of the group and also if not dealt properly, the teamwork will became low efficient. However,we have to confront this problem and actually,we have the ability to solve this.
So,how to solve it? In my opinion,at this time,we need to conform to the rules strictly. Because we are all friends, we cannot obey the rules strictly. We need to attend to other's personal feelings. We need to get along with others after the work. But when the characters of the members in one group are quite different, we must obey the rules strictly,for the sake of efficiency. It means that we need to have a specific hierarchy. The leader of the group is supposed to organize the work coherently. He or she should give members specific works so all the members need to do is the given work. If they have any idea, they should talk with the leader personally but not talk with other members. Whether the leader will take the ideas is the leader's right. The members are not expected to interfere.
I think everyone can understand this kind of action. It is good for a group to work efficiently.
Thursday, 19 April 2012
Blog 6 Should I Forgive Him?
I heard people sometimes said:” I will never forgive him for…”
I am not interested in the reason why people will not forgive somebody. However, I am more fascinated by the word “forgive” itself, because “never” is such a powerful word to describe “Forgive”. So, I ask myself: what is forgiveness?
I remembered that a girl had cheated in an exam in my high school. Unfortunately, after having seen that scene I thought very bad of her and used her as a typical dishonest example in many of my essays. Every time I saw her, in my mind her face was labeled as a dishonest person, and this conception was too difficult to be eliminated.
After a long time I rethought and asked myself some questions: why can’t I forgive her behavior? Is it so important for me that I should even not forgive her? What if now she has already changed into another person who has known what she did was wrong? So then is there any reason and meaning for me to not forgive here? I find no reason and no meaning in not forgiving her if she has corrected her misbehavior. And so this is it, the inside of forgiveness.
In my opinion, forgiveness is a reaction responding to changes, or in other words, corrections for mistakes. People are quite innocent when they do something wrong but have no idea why and how the thing goes wrong. If a person knows it is wrong just because other people regard it as a wrong behavior, we should not forgive him because he is neither aware of his fault nor does he make any change to correct it. If a person realizes his fault and then sincerely makes changes to correct it, others can say that they forgive him.
Newton discovered the laws of nature after an apple dropping from a tree hit him. Before that unique moment, I think Newton even did not have any perception what gravity is. Edison failed more than one thousand times in the exploration of finding the exact material to make a bulb, he just kept trying. The only thing he knew was that he was only a child in front of sea of truth, and the only way he could grow up was through making mistakes and learning from them.
These examples reveal how ignorant people are when they face the unknown and indicated how they responded to it. Actually, we are all as ignorant and helpless as young little children when we are exploring in our lives. When little children do something wrong, people can easily forgive children’s fault without hesitation. So it is the same in the case when adults do something wrong. For unknown, adults are equally ignorant as children, because they even have no concept of what they have never experienced. Adults are on the same way with children to make mistakes. The difference is just distinguished by people's ages, but how old they are cannot represent how far they have gone to understand the routine in our society. Both children and adults can only learn by making mistakes, or the mistakes made by human’s ancestors.
Some people may argue that those who do great damage to someone or to the society cannot be forgiven forever. No, it is not true. The one who does so can be forgiven if he has learned his mistake, but this does not imply that he can get rid of punishment. It is laws that ensure the whole society to keep in order. Besides, our morality also plays an essential role. And forgiveness is a part of it. Learn to forgive is an art. People should leave room for others to make corrections. People will never expect worse from a person when they are really considering the situation, because it is not human nature. So therein our history exists people’s imagination of Utopia; all human expect peace and love from the bottom of their hearts, rather than negative emotions . Forgiveness gives us the chance to expect better for others. It is a positive and magic power that helps create a better world.
The next time when you want to say, “I will never forgive someone”, please tell yourself: forgiveness is beautiful, I am doing something brilliantly good to someone, and I am creating a better world!
I am not interested in the reason why people will not forgive somebody. However, I am more fascinated by the word “forgive” itself, because “never” is such a powerful word to describe “Forgive”. So, I ask myself: what is forgiveness?
I remembered that a girl had cheated in an exam in my high school. Unfortunately, after having seen that scene I thought very bad of her and used her as a typical dishonest example in many of my essays. Every time I saw her, in my mind her face was labeled as a dishonest person, and this conception was too difficult to be eliminated.
After a long time I rethought and asked myself some questions: why can’t I forgive her behavior? Is it so important for me that I should even not forgive her? What if now she has already changed into another person who has known what she did was wrong? So then is there any reason and meaning for me to not forgive here? I find no reason and no meaning in not forgiving her if she has corrected her misbehavior. And so this is it, the inside of forgiveness.
In my opinion, forgiveness is a reaction responding to changes, or in other words, corrections for mistakes. People are quite innocent when they do something wrong but have no idea why and how the thing goes wrong. If a person knows it is wrong just because other people regard it as a wrong behavior, we should not forgive him because he is neither aware of his fault nor does he make any change to correct it. If a person realizes his fault and then sincerely makes changes to correct it, others can say that they forgive him.
Newton discovered the laws of nature after an apple dropping from a tree hit him. Before that unique moment, I think Newton even did not have any perception what gravity is. Edison failed more than one thousand times in the exploration of finding the exact material to make a bulb, he just kept trying. The only thing he knew was that he was only a child in front of sea of truth, and the only way he could grow up was through making mistakes and learning from them.
These examples reveal how ignorant people are when they face the unknown and indicated how they responded to it. Actually, we are all as ignorant and helpless as young little children when we are exploring in our lives. When little children do something wrong, people can easily forgive children’s fault without hesitation. So it is the same in the case when adults do something wrong. For unknown, adults are equally ignorant as children, because they even have no concept of what they have never experienced. Adults are on the same way with children to make mistakes. The difference is just distinguished by people's ages, but how old they are cannot represent how far they have gone to understand the routine in our society. Both children and adults can only learn by making mistakes, or the mistakes made by human’s ancestors.
Some people may argue that those who do great damage to someone or to the society cannot be forgiven forever. No, it is not true. The one who does so can be forgiven if he has learned his mistake, but this does not imply that he can get rid of punishment. It is laws that ensure the whole society to keep in order. Besides, our morality also plays an essential role. And forgiveness is a part of it. Learn to forgive is an art. People should leave room for others to make corrections. People will never expect worse from a person when they are really considering the situation, because it is not human nature. So therein our history exists people’s imagination of Utopia; all human expect peace and love from the bottom of their hearts, rather than negative emotions . Forgiveness gives us the chance to expect better for others. It is a positive and magic power that helps create a better world.
The next time when you want to say, “I will never forgive someone”, please tell yourself: forgiveness is beautiful, I am doing something brilliantly good to someone, and I am creating a better world!
Wednesday, 18 April 2012
blog7: My "girlfriend"
In this blog, I would like to tell you a true story about a girl and I.
Once upon a time, there was a girl named A in my senior school. She had beautiful eyes with short straight hair. She was not tall, but she always stood gracefully. She was easygoing, whenever she talked to other people, her face would wear a sweet smile. In conclusion, what the first impression she left on me was sunny, outgoing and warm-hearted. Of course, her merits could not be restricted to only such superficial things. More importantly, she worked very hard and as a result, she always got the first place in my class. To be honest, I really admired her. In my opinion, when a girl can be best characterized by beauty, goodness and diligence, no one could begrudge her his genuine praise. I liked talking with her. I thought we had many interests in common. Once we started talking with each other, regardless of how boring the topic was, we always found it hard stopping. We talked about study, showing our anger about a difficult math exam. We talked about our teachers, laughing at their funny behavior. We talked about our failure, giving our sincere encouragement to each other. We talked about the future, imagining a beautiful scene in our mind. Because of her, I never dare to be slack about my study. With her help, I was smoothly over the hump after one and another adversity.
She was my best girl friend, but I knew that we all did not want to combine those two words together. In our relationship, there was a boundary. Although it was vague and fragile, we just stood beside and never intended to transcend it. Sometimes my classmates would gossip about us, but we did not care about it. We meticulously took care of our pure friendship, regarding it as a small tree that needed us to water and give it sunshine.
Some people tend to say if a girl is suitable for you, you should pursue her without any hesitation; otherwise, you may be regretful. However, I think, in our lifetime, some girls can be your girlfriends, but some girls, even at the depth of heart, there is a voice tells you that she is the person you are looking for, you should bury that emotion in your mind. When I recalled the time spent with her, I always wondered if one of us finally said that phrase, then what would happen. Maybe we will get together. Maybe, conversely, we will be apart forever. I feel lucky, for neither of us decides to transform this flourishing tree into a rose, even though it probably can be more beautiful. A girlfriend is difficult to find, even so, a real female bosom friend who can listen carefully to your complaint, give you advice without any vicious purposes, motivate you to overcome every difficulty in the life and console you when you feel sad is more worthy of cherishing!
Sunday, 15 April 2012
Blog 7: I Want to Travel lone
I want to travel alone.
Firstly, I prefer traveling by train. Traveling by train is my favorite way of traveling. Why do I love traveling by train but other vehicles? There are three reasons. The first reason is that it takes less money to take a train relatively. The second reason is I enjoy the scenery out of the window. When I travel by train, what I like best is viewing the scenery out of the window. When I left Changsha for Zhengzhou last year, it was late autumn. The trees which were in subtropics zone were still covered by green leaves, meanwhile, the plants which were in warm temperate zone had put on their yellow coat or even only left their bald trunk. Interestingly, when the train ran, the scenery out of the window switch constantly, which was just like I enjoyed the process of the transition of seasons within hours. The third reason is that I can talk with all kind of people. They have different careers, backgrounds and experiences; come from different regions and class; contact different people in their daily life. I always learn a lot from them.
Personally, I do not have interest in those famous scenic spots in which there are always a mass of crowds there, such as, Hangzhou West Lake, Mountain Huang, the Forbidden City and so on. I prefer to walk in immense forests and snowfield of Greater Khingan Mountains, see the aurora in Arctic Village, walk in the Gobi Desert of Hexi Corridor or experience the cruelty of nature in Qinghai-Tibet Plateau. If I go to the south of China, I will wonder in a small ancient town of Jiangnan holding an oil-paper umbrella, hoping to encounter a girl like a bouquet of lilacs with anxiety and resentment or go to Yunnan to experience cultures of minorities.
In accordance with my plan, I will be wondering along a road in the side of the Wusuli River.
Blog7 Nobody can reach the acme of perfection
Yesterday when I
browse the RenRen, the motto transmitted by others also resonate me in some
extent though the motto has been told since I was a child. The motto is
something like this “The life is too short, why do we always make the
featherweight influences our important mood.” “We care about others’ views so
much that we don’t have the courage to do what we like, to chase the one we
love. We are totally immerged into others’ embroidered stories and comments and
then lose ourselves. But actually nobody has the energy to think what you’re
thinking about; we ought not to overestimate the status that we are in others’
mind. It doesn’t matter to be talked or to be misunderstood by others. The more
you live in others’ eyes, the more you lose in your way.” I have a great
reflection on this feeling.
Take myself as a
example, sometimes I think my life is always in a hurry. I am busying at getting
along with others, finishing the assignments in advance, comparing myself with
others, studying hard to live up to parents’ expectation, to avoid myself being
behind others. It seems that everything deviate my goals is useless and no profit
to get so I shouldn’t spend my time on it. I tried myself to do as much as possible
to study and to get along with others. But actually, I am really tired to be
like that. For I want to show the most perfect part of myself to others, I
tried to be talkative, tried to show myself as another person and hide what I
like in my heart so I live a very exhausting and unhappy life for a long time.
Even now I don’t know what I have learnt and what kind of person I want to be as
if all my work is for nothing and I am getting nowhere. The situation is very
real to me and I wants to escape, but has no idea how to do so or how to even
approach the situation rationally.
It is until last
week I do the color quiz, I realize this kind of emotion is severe. "Tension
and stress is brought on by trying to cope with conditions which are out of her
control, using up all her strength and leaving her feeling inadequate. she
wishes to escape into a more peaceful and problem-free environment, in which
she will no longer have to assert herself or deal with so much pressure."
Maybe now I have the awareness to make a difference. Though it is not a good
character to be quiet but I do like this feeling of not being disturbing and
live peacefully. I want to be what I really want to be though others may not
like it.
In addition, our
energy is limited, if we always want to reach the acme of perfection, we cannot
even finish a simple thing well. And as time passes, when you find whatever you
want to achieve cannot be achieved in a short period of time and cannot be
changed for your inability and indecisiveness, you will put a large amount of
stress on your shoulder and live unhappily and tired. That is my true feeling
and it makes me uncomfortable and constrained. Though I haven’t find a good
solution, at least I find the problem and try to change.
Yesterday I
watched a movie in cinema called “Street Dance 2”. The hero in the story cared
too much about his opponent’s view and escape out of the shadow of failure. He
dared not to show his real passion in dancing, which limited his development
and made him desperate. But at least he realized what is the priority in his
life and showed himself freely and unconstraintly in the final competition. He
both gained success and love.
I hope everyone
who saw this blog can express himself freely and show the real character to
others without caring others’ view too much in the daily life. Just laugh
whenever you want and just keep silence whenever you like. We live for
ourselves. We cannot reach the acme of perfection and make everyone satisfied.
Even others don’t appreciate you; at least you are enjoying yourself. Though
you may not have a large amount of friends, at least you have a few friends who
can understand you and deserve you to treasure. Though you are not the best,
you must have some glimmers which can be found by others. It’s good to strive
for excellence, it is more important to do things according your ability and
don’t lose yourself all the time. I hope everyone can live happy.
browse the RenRen, the motto transmitted by others also resonate me in some
extent though the motto has been told since I was a child. The motto is
something like this “The life is too short, why do we always make the
featherweight influences our important mood.” “We care about others’ views so
much that we don’t have the courage to do what we like, to chase the one we
love. We are totally immerged into others’ embroidered stories and comments and
then lose ourselves. But actually nobody has the energy to think what you’re
thinking about; we ought not to overestimate the status that we are in others’
mind. It doesn’t matter to be talked or to be misunderstood by others. The more
you live in others’ eyes, the more you lose in your way.” I have a great
reflection on this feeling.
Take myself as a
example, sometimes I think my life is always in a hurry. I am busying at getting
along with others, finishing the assignments in advance, comparing myself with
others, studying hard to live up to parents’ expectation, to avoid myself being
behind others. It seems that everything deviate my goals is useless and no profit
to get so I shouldn’t spend my time on it. I tried myself to do as much as possible
to study and to get along with others. But actually, I am really tired to be
like that. For I want to show the most perfect part of myself to others, I
tried to be talkative, tried to show myself as another person and hide what I
like in my heart so I live a very exhausting and unhappy life for a long time.
Even now I don’t know what I have learnt and what kind of person I want to be as
if all my work is for nothing and I am getting nowhere. The situation is very
real to me and I wants to escape, but has no idea how to do so or how to even
approach the situation rationally.
It is until last
week I do the color quiz, I realize this kind of emotion is severe. "Tension
and stress is brought on by trying to cope with conditions which are out of her
control, using up all her strength and leaving her feeling inadequate. she
wishes to escape into a more peaceful and problem-free environment, in which
she will no longer have to assert herself or deal with so much pressure."
Maybe now I have the awareness to make a difference. Though it is not a good
character to be quiet but I do like this feeling of not being disturbing and
live peacefully. I want to be what I really want to be though others may not
like it.
In addition, our
energy is limited, if we always want to reach the acme of perfection, we cannot
even finish a simple thing well. And as time passes, when you find whatever you
want to achieve cannot be achieved in a short period of time and cannot be
changed for your inability and indecisiveness, you will put a large amount of
stress on your shoulder and live unhappily and tired. That is my true feeling
and it makes me uncomfortable and constrained. Though I haven’t find a good
solution, at least I find the problem and try to change.
Yesterday I
watched a movie in cinema called “Street Dance 2”. The hero in the story cared
too much about his opponent’s view and escape out of the shadow of failure. He
dared not to show his real passion in dancing, which limited his development
and made him desperate. But at least he realized what is the priority in his
life and showed himself freely and unconstraintly in the final competition. He
both gained success and love.
I hope everyone
who saw this blog can express himself freely and show the real character to
others without caring others’ view too much in the daily life. Just laugh
whenever you want and just keep silence whenever you like. We live for
ourselves. We cannot reach the acme of perfection and make everyone satisfied.
Even others don’t appreciate you; at least you are enjoying yourself. Though
you may not have a large amount of friends, at least you have a few friends who
can understand you and deserve you to treasure. Though you are not the best,
you must have some glimmers which can be found by others. It’s good to strive
for excellence, it is more important to do things according your ability and
don’t lose yourself all the time. I hope everyone can live happy.
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